Most of us have preconceived notions about relationships. Our parents model them for us when we are young, and we read about lovers in books and see them in the reports and in movies. But, while everyone grows up forming her or his own picture of the perfect romantic relationship, very little, if any, of this picture starts from an individual’s desires and desires. Therefore, we create relationships based on what society wants. In other words, we unconsciously and unintentionally act like we think our company is intended to act, in view to what our spouse and everyone else would like, as opposed to what great to us. Sadly, this causes many people to lose their sense of self when in an intimate relationship. comment arrêter d’amour mal en amour ?
Staying in a same-sex marriage has not spared me personally of society’s relationship best practice rules. It took me years to determine that I needed something different. While previous relationship activities were somewhat gratifying, they did not provide me with everything We desired. As I commenced to reflect on my unsatisfying relationships, I asked myself the initially two questions: “Why were my relationships only mediocre? inch I realized it was because I was socialized to perceive any romance a certain way-without considering my own wants and desires. Each relationship experienced to meet specific standards based on the things i had observed and learned growing up. We all all grow up with spoken and unspoken guidelines about relationships. For example, I remember hearing that it’s improper to live with someone before getting married. (Thank God We listened to my cardiovascular rather than my head on this one! Otherwise, I actually would have been forty-nine before I lived with someone! ) Here are a sampling of other rules that we observed growing up in the 60s and 1970s.
– The woman does the home duties while the man goes to work.
– Men only do strong household chores (shoveling snow, mowing the grass, and so on).
Thank amazing benefits I grew up during a time when women were questioning-and still question-these gender stereotypes. Nevertheless , there are a host of other unspoken rules that contain not do with sexuality. For instance, many people believe couples should are in the same home. Though this is a commonly held belief of what it means to maintain a relationship, it may well not allow people to be at their best. We have multiple friends who are married but do not share a home. This works on their behalf! They will are happier with the other person having created their own picture of what a relationship can be.
Continue to, because of societal objectives, each of us brings thousands of beliefs into an intimate relationship. Here are several more examples. Feel free to add ones that speak to you.
– Couples have to take their vacations together.
– Couples have to like each other’s friends.
– Couples have sex all the time-forever.
– Associates are clairvoyant about each other’s feelings and thoughts.
– All couples will want children. (As a subject of fact, the parable is that having children strengthens the bond between the couple. )
– Couples who really love the other person don’t fight or disagree.
– It is the job of each person in a romantic relationship to make the other person happy.
– Relationship is forever.